jackson, victoria lynn

[victoria lynn jackson]

welcome to blue river institution ,

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allow me to introduce myself. i am victoria lynn jackson and i am nineteen. last time i checked, i was female. seeing that i'm here, there must be something wrong with me, right? well, my disorder(s) is/are/include: dependent personality disorder and autophobia (fear of being alone). i know, i'm seriously fucked up, aren't i? well with proper treatment, i will get better, right? anyway, i am 5'5 feet tall and weigh around 114 pounds. some people say i resemble becky lou filip, but i just don't see it. anymore, more about me, right?

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basic information ,

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name victoria lynn jackson
nickname vic
general appearance

[/i] vic's slightly wavy hair reaches a little below shoulder length. she's dyed it several times before, but ended up dyeing it back to its orginal brown color. when you look at her face, you notice that she has a pretty soft complexion, which goes well with her personality. her eyes are a striking blue, and she's been told before that they look like the ocean. vic has been called anorexic before because of how slim she is, but she can't really control her weight.
sexuality[/i] pansexual
birthday may third
distinguishing features[/i] vic has several cigarette scars on her back from an abusive relationship she was involved in before. her most noticeable scar is a three inch line right above her eyebrow, from where her head was smacked into a wall by her ex.
likes[/i] making people happy, being told what to do, taking pictures, music, the dark, making new friends, reading
dislikes[/i] making decisions, feeling alone, watching others get hurt, talking about her feelings, upsetting people
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personality ,

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patient's mental disorders / disabilities

[/i] dependent personality disorder and autophobia (fear of being alone)
comprehensive personality / behaviour[/i] while most people end up growing out of their dependency on others, victoria never did. she's a complete pushover, and will do anything anyone says, even if she feels it's wrong. recently, she's slowly started to become a little more hesitant when someone tells her to do something she doesn't believe in, but in the end, she'll always end up listening to them. vic's afraid to make her own decisions. the thought of doing so gives her panic attacks and can completely put her over the edge. there have been plenty of times where she'll avoid certain situations so she won't have to pick what she wants. for example, if it was dinner time, and she had to pick between eating chicken or beef, she'd pick neither and just not eat that night.

if you didn't know that victoria had a personality disorder, you'd probably think that she was just two-faced. mainly, the girl just does things to please other people. she literally has no back bone, and just goes with whatever anyone else wants. there were times where she'd start off the day hanging out with someone who was straightedge, and she wouldn't do anything with them, yet, she'd end the day with someone who does drugs and would go off and get high. it's not just her actions that make her seem two faced; it's her personality. it often fluctuates depending on who she's with. vic always feels the pressure to adapt, and she'd rather do something someone else wants then to actually figure out what she'd like.

overall, victoria is a nice person. she always greets everyone with a smile, and does her best to make her first impression seem sweet. she can be sort of shy, but after a while of talking, she'll always find herself getting attached. once that happens, though, she's on you like a leach, and she'll do whatever she can to find ways to make you like her. she wants to be the person everyone wants to be with, and will do her best to do that. if she can't, she'll find ways to be with you until you tell her otherwise. if she's ever by herself for more than an hour, she'll get anxiety attacks bad enough where she'll start to scream and break things, which isn't something you'd expect from her normal, loving self.
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background information ,

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family member names

[/i] mother - - julian marie jackson - - 45
father - - robert ray jackson - - 28
comprehensive history[/i] vic didn't have a devastating childhood at all. in fact, she had a rather nice one. she had two loving parents, who did their best to take care of her. they were never too strict, but at the same time, they knew when to enforce their rules. they taught victoria how to be respectful and proper, and she always took everything in and did exactly like they said. at first, they seemed like the cute, perfect little family. there were never many arguments, and all of her teachers adored her. none of the real problems came until she reached middle school.

originally, victoria's parents were worried about her trying to break away from them. they had heard plenty of stories where, during middle school, kids started to really try and exert their independence, and often, it included rebelling. they had expected this and were prepared for it, but it never came. in fact, it seemed that, as victoria grew older, she became more dependent on them instead of the other way around. it worried them a little, but they figured she'd become less dependent on them, and gain dependence over time.

after entering high school, she did become less dependent on them. the only thing was that she became more dependent on new friends she made. vic easily met new people and kept them around, but it was mainly because of how easy she was to take advantage of. she never realized it, though. she started going out more, and her parents were ecstatic, figuring that she was blooming into a dependent young adult. it was a shame they didn't realize what was happening earlier, though, because eventually, she ended up meeting ryan. ryan treated her like a princess at first, and it seemed like he understood her; she loved it. after a while, they started going out, but as time went on, and ryan realized that she would do anything he said, he started to let his anger out on her. the longer their relationship continued, the worse the beatings were.

he was never caught until the last time she saw him. she was home alone, and he ended up coming over, fuming after loosing his job. she tried comforting him, and as a result, he dragged her by the hair until gripping her head and slamming it into the wall. unfortunately for him, this happened right when her parents were getting home from a date. they called the cops on him and rushed her to a hospital. after healing, they sent her to therapy, where it didn't take long for her psychiatrist to realize what was wrong. that was when she was sent here, seeing as, at that time, vic was only a few months short of her eighteenth birthday, and it was easy to tell that she would not make it long by herself.
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behind the mask ,

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hi my name is cecilia and i am sixteen years old. last time i checked, i'm a female. i've been rping for three years and i love it. i found this site from an ad on another site and i must say, it's awesome! so anyway, i live in eastern time and i will be on at least an hour everyday i currently have this shiny new character and none. you can contact me through pm or by only pm, please. i promise you i have read the rules and i will be a dedicated member to the site!

As the morning cold nipped at Vic's face, she couldn't help but to notice how nice it felt. If there was one thing she had learned over the years, it was that long nights did not mix well with early mornings. Unfortunately, with jobs like these, it was pretty unavoidable. Though she had been to thousands of shows before, and had actually followed a few of her friends bands for a couple of dates, this was the first time she was actually on a tour herself, which resulted in a lot more parties, but also a lot more hangovers. She knew how to deal with it, and had been using the method for years. In a way, it made her even more grateful for starting her habits so young. Unzipping her camera bag, she pulled out a metal container, which held a joint she had rolled up a day before. Lately, she had been planning ahead on a few things, and she was thankful for it.

After lighting up, she inhaled, and instantly felt the pounding in her head calm down some. There was a reason why the helpful plant was sometimes used for medical purposes. Vic just wasn't sure why the government hadn't made it completely legal yet, but it's not like she cared either way; she always did what she wanted. Taking another hit, she pulled her legs in so that she was sitting Indian style on the ground, letting herself relax and enjoy the early morning calm. It wouldn't be long until the peaceful quietness would disappear as the sound of overly excited teenagers took the place of it. Vic didn't mind the excitement. In fact, it always seemed to pump up her own energy. It was just nice to enjoy the peace, as well.

After finishing off the joint, she was feeling better than ever. Grabbing the camera bag she had brought with her, she pulled out her camera and one of her more basics lenses, seeing as she had no idea what she wanted to take photos of at that moment. After getting everything situated, Vic made sure her camera had the strap on it before putting it around her neck and looking around, viewing the outside world from a different level. The first thing that caught her attention, though, was the still rising sun. Not fully up yet, it rested low on the horizon, causing it to make a weird reflection on some of the tour buses. Even better, the sky was slightly red. Sure, that could be bad news later on, according to the old myth about red skies meaning storms, but for now, it was absolutely gorgeous, and it was allowing all of her surroundings to be tinted.

Angling the camera up to the sky, she started to snap some pictures, glad that her job required to have a digital SLR camera instead of just a plain digital one like she used to have when she first got involved with photography while she was a teenager. The camera seemed to capture the pictures just as she saw them, which made it a lot easier to show off the beauty to others. Before she knew it, she found herself wanting to find more beauty. She now had plenty of pictures of the sky, but what else could be out there at such an early time? Collecting everything up, Vic started to wander down the rows of buses, looking all around as her creativity and curiosity got the best of her.

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