Exploring the grounds (staff only)

[baylee thomas shepherd]

X It was wonderful to be outside again. Pitty it wasn’t from the hospital though, be in his garden or even with a girlfriend. Sixth hospital in an year was bad enough, and still he doesn’t know when or how long he would be staying in this hospital. So far he have broken his record, of being here for nearly year. His arms have recently stopped bleeding as have been cutting again. Great if the staff find out he would be back in the shock therapy room. Even though Jinx told him there was no shock therapy here, Baylee didn’t believe him. He have been lied too before and it have gotten him to accept that no one can be trusted, not even the staff. The staff are the reason he was suffering more than he was. Got his usual black jacket out basically too hide the bloody arm, he was on his way to the gardens as it was the safe place to be in too do the deed.

X Slowly walking towards the spot where he hidden the glass. This was too prevent the staff finding it on him, while he went back to room. His blue eyes were filled with suffering from the pass he received. Now he had double trouble on him as he done a stupid thing and allowing himself too kiss a girl. Even though he was confused about himself, did he like girls or boys. Life was so fucked up for him right now, he just wanted it too end. Right now. Agree with himself, so far Darwin was being quiet, so he was lucid enough and knew what he was doing right now. But then he can simple blame it on his schiphenina. The doctors didn’t give a shit about him anyway, they had no idea what it was like to feel like this. Slowly he took his black jacket off, his left arm was covered in three fresh marks which made on himself yesterday. He had the glass in his right hand, slowly he aimed it across his left arm, and made the glass slice right through the flesh, making it bleed again.

X Watching the scarlet liquid pouring from the cut he just made was great. He leaned against the wall as the droplet fell on the floor, staining the once ivory gravel. That feels lot better, hopefully it would end soon he closed his eyes, feeling the stress leaving his body. Baylee haven’t been taking his medication here like he was supposed too. Even the hallucation ones, too him they weren’t working anyway. So he basically stopped taking them. It was a smart trick, he would hid it under his tongue and pretend to swallow them, once the doctor or nurse left the room, he simple spit the pill out and go too sleep. Suddenly he heard something, and immediately placed his jacket back on and hid the glass again. The blood was still dripping and it was hitting the gravel more as he stood up, waiting too see who it would be. Please don’t be a doctor he whispered to himself, as his heart raced like mad hoping it was at least a patient. But his gut feeling was telling him that it wasn’t and he was going to be in serious trouble.

Open TAGGED
PANIC! ITS LAUZ @ CAUTION TEMPLATE
This is where you see a very aggressive side and worst than before. NOTES

[jason laurence sharpe]

JUST WAIT ON THE STREET WITH YOUR ENDLESS WORDS
LOST FOREVER IN THE OCEAN OF FORGETFUL NOISE
SOMETIMES, EVERYONE CARES, BUT CAN'T HEAR

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At least it was still warm enough to be outside. August was a colder month in New Jersey, and he still wasn't used to it. Of course, he'd grown up in England, climate tended to be higher on the cool scale there too. He supposed those years in the desert had screwed him over when it came to northerner weather, even if it had been a good number of years ago. At least, it was cold enough to him for it to warrant gloves, and a jacket. Both clothing articles were brown, the fabric a hybrid of something cottony and something...well, something else. It was fuzzy like felt, and warm.

Technically, he was violating warden rules. But he did that every day. There weren't enough of them not too. And even the few who weren't booked overtime rarely felt like hanging around with the annoying, oblivious, gentleman deaf guy who didn't have a life. But he relented. He typically hated hanging out with himself too. Of course, the standing of rule of never patrolling the facility alone without a partner, the rule he was currently...er, bending, wasn't very well enforced. So why bother? Rules could be broken now and then, provided one had good reason... Jason didn't have "good" reason, but ah well.

He'd spent most of his outside stroll in the deserted dead gardens wishing he knew how to plant and grow things. Many he could get paid extra if he did something about all the dead flowers and bare bushes and empty pots next spring. Worth a shot. But if they wouldn't pay him, it was a lost cause. He needed money. The warden had used his break time to smoke, sitting on one of the benches. Smoking was a "leisure" activity according to management and was therefore frowned upon when an employee spent time clocked-in doing it. But after five minutes of this, he was out of things to philosophize about. And back on the clock.

Jason stood, stretched, beginning to wander back toward the dark interior of the building. He felt tired. He needed some action, something to do besides walk around. Somebody to bother... He smiled, shook his head. Preferably a female doctor. Or any doctor, since they were all amusing. Or maybe he could flirt objectively with some female patient...

The figure that materialized out of the grass before him was none of these wide range of things. A male patient. Tall, very blond, body swathed in a heavy black leather jacket, dull colors for clothing. It was therefore easy to glimpse the vivid dark red veins running down his fingers. Even worse than being male, he was one of those pain nuts, those poor fucked up kids who turned to cutting themselves as a way to relieve stress and survive the world. Jason stiffened, stopped where he was on the path, not quite certain what the look in the boy's eye was saying. Not quite certain what object he'd used to cut himself, and where it still was. Not quite certain he trusted standing frozen nearly within arms reach of a kid who probably didn't like him just for his occupation. Shit.

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Case: Sharpe, Jason
File #: 531
Date: 9/21/10
Cabinet: Gardens
Inquirer: Shepherd, Baylee
Status: Staff Only
Alarm: Twitchy
Notes: I got bored, thought I'd say hello. Feel free to have Baylee get pissed off. ^^

[baylee thomas shepherd]

BAYLEETHOMASSHEPHERD

Seeing the blood flow down his arm made him feel lot better now. The stress and pain have left his body. It was a brilliant feeling. Droplets was running down his arm and onto the floor again, showing how badly he have cut. He saw no staff which was great, sitting down he closed his eyes, this was like his fifth sudical attempt in an asylum. The place where they were safe from all these crazy act, it was pathetic and stupid. He was hoping this time he would be left alone and finally allowed too die. Death doesn't really scare him, in fact he welcomes it, he wanted too come now so the pain from the voices and anything else can finally leave him alone. Clouds were beginning too form a again and a violent storm was going too come. Baylee believes in the greek mythology is real. That Zeus, Poseidon, Hades, Demeter, Hera etc were all alive and living now, Demi-God, Titans etc were also true, trying too kill them all off. If no one believe him than they can simple piss off and leave. Baylee wouldn't stop believing it and would keep out of Zeus lighting rage as much as he could.

Suddenly the rain began too fall and making his body soaking wet. Just what I want the rain too help the dying process. Thank you rain god. He just hoped that The Fates would cut his mortal string very soon as he was getting fed up now. Sounds of tapping shoes caught his attention and he looked up. A girl which didn't look like a patient which was good really, it was his sister who died in the car crash. She had the wounds from what happened, he blinked a couple times making sure she was still there. He was glad of that since a doctor or any sort of staff would have sedated him and locked in the solitary room where he would serve a week or maybe more since he broke one of the many rules. He really couldn't care less if they came and locked him away. But suddenly image vanished and another person came, he looked up seeing someone in a uniform, worst still a male. Baylee gathered some more strength he back away. He had the blade still at hand, threatening him with it. Now he would stab , assault him and then leave her too die in him own blood. He couldn't care less for other people, they were nothing too him. People have hurt him, or they deserve some pain back. Well in his mind and case anyway. I would advise you turn around and leave! Unless you want my little buddy too play with your cute little insides! He growled as he was very aggressively towards him.

The blood loss was beginning too attack his body more now. Go away! Just leave me alone! You aren’t going too hurt me! I would fight before you have that chance you piece of dog crap! He screamed out towards him. He haven’t had the problem with him being a warden, he haven’t been let down by them before. It was only just that males have hurt him and he wouldn’t allow anyone too hurt him again. Slowly his eyes were drooping and he waited for his guy too turn around and leave him alone.

[/font][/size][/color]

*WORDCOUNTINPOST* ::: five.six.five
*POSTTAGGEDFOR* ::: jason
*WRITERSNOTES* ::: half recycled, and i need some angry muse
*STATUSOFTHEPOST* ::: complete

[jason laurence sharpe]

JUST WAIT ON THE STREET WITH YOUR ENDLESS WORDS
LOST FOREVER IN THE OCEAN OF FORGETFUL NOISE
SOMETIMES, EVERYONE CARES, BUT CAN'T HEAR

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A knife.

A knife in a hospital. In a hospital and this guy had a fucking knife.

Jason held his hands, open, palms out, defense, but loose. He wasn't going to do anything.

A knife.

Snap out of it you idiot, you've seen a knife before hundreds of times. But not recently. Not held by anyone other than himself recently. Not pointed at him recently. Come to that, when was the last time he'd been in combat? Real combat? Not of a good number of years. But even after years of security jobs, the adrenaline still pumped like it knew what he had to do. Knew how to disarm the kid, knew how to get hold of the knife, knew how to flip it back, knew how to dodge and twist. so why didn't he trust himself to be able to do it? Why just stand there like an idiot still trying to wrap his mind around the words he'd read.

Because of the accident. That was why, so the self pity story went. there was so much uncertainty, things he hadn't needed to do, things he couldn't do, things he hadn't practiced... He was fit, but he wasn't militarized anymore. He wasn't in complete working order; the factory settings had never been completely reset. They never could be.

Thinking about being calm and collected had never been something he enjoyed. So he skipped that idea, and decided to play it by ear. He couldn't just leave the boy with a blade; who knew what he'd do to himself or anyone else? And there was his job mandate... And his ego... "Please tell me you didn't just call my internal organs 'cute.' I've seen 'em. They aren't that pretty, kid." He crossed his arms slowly, weighted subtly shifted to the balls of his feet should he need to move. Obviously, this was not a great response, but he was relying on his ability to play people and the likelihood of this boy stabbing him being hopefully low.

Though looking into the younger guy's eye, he felt as if mercury were settling in his stomach. He'd always been a failure at reading people. By the dark, other-worldly fury in the young man's irises, Jason knew there was little question of his getting stabbed. forcing himself not to swallow and back away, he kept his half irritated, half bemused, half edgy stance, but let his arms fall to his sides. He had a stick, but that was useless to him in a fight against a blade. He wished he had a taser, or something with a trigger...

"I'm not planning on hurting you. I just can't leave you with that," he gestured slightly to the guy's threatening hand. "It's my job."

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Case: Sharpe, Jason
File #: 458
Date: 9/22/10
Cabinet: Gardens
Inquirer: Shepherd, Baylee
Status: Staff Only
Alarm: Neutral
Notes: Could be longer... ><

[baylee thomas shepherd]

BAYLEETHOMASSHEPHERD

Baylee was watching him closer than ever. His heart was racing like a million times a minute. It as scary moment and he had no idea what too do. The plan of him leaving him alone was out of the question now. His hand with the knife was shaking more. He couldn’t hurt anyone, expect himself. He looked at the warden more, something about him made him see something. I can’t deal with this anymore. I know what you going too do. You would report me to the doctors here and I would then be in deep trouble. I know you will. Your all the same. You confused and trick people like me. Pretend too be our friend and then you not. People have done it too me before. Someone closed too me hurt me recently. Broken my heart even, so just let me do this please! He begged the warden, who he didn’t know yet. He was holding back the tears I shall not cry in front of him. I shall not cry in front of him he kept on saying too himself over and over again. I have nothing left here! No one cares! So just let me go too the other place! He looked down and watched the blood performing a huge blood pool.

Please tell me you didn't just call my internal organs 'cute.' I've seen 'em. They aren't that pretty, kid, Baylee’s eyes looked at him growling slightly. This guy have no idea who he is messing with. Did he know that some patients were really psycho and go completely insane? Playing with the knife now, mainly the blade and licking it as it felt really good. Then he spoke towards the guy again. Moving towards him now, making the blade pressed lightly onto his stomach giggling the same time. Let me see them then. I want too see how pretty your insides are. Also I am not a kid, I am twenty years old. he was mocking him now. His hands began too stroked his face and the flash back came back towards him. He stopped and backed away from him. I would make a deal with you ok. I would give you the knife and you would trot off he spoke with a slight nervousness in his voice. Now can you just piss off he might have given him a knife, but unknown too this warden guy, he had many more sharp items lying around the garden. For him too cut himself more when he was alone.

I'm not planning on hurting you. I just can't leave you with that Baylee chuckled and he couldn’t help that now. Yeah right! He yelled at him and kept looking at him. Look I haven’t got the knife now so leave me alone! He yelled and then walked passed him and then pushed against him lightly, just too piss him off really. The blood drop onto the floor and he sat on the green bench, shaking and holding his head. Why did you leave me here all alone? he thought as he missed Michael so much and wanted him here by his side now, where he can be happy again.

[/font][/color]

*WORDCOUNTINPOST* ::: five.three.four
*POSTTAGGEDFOR* ::: jason
*WRITERSNOTES* ::: n/a
*STATUSOFTHEPOST* ::: complete

[jason laurence sharpe]

JUST WAIT ON THE STREET WITH YOUR ENDLESS WORDS
LOST FOREVER IN THE OCEAN OF FORGETFUL NOISE
SOMETIMES, EVERYONE CARES, BUT CAN'T HEAR

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Jason didn't like the way the guy kept playing with the knife, the way he seemed so hypnotized by the blood and the growing puddle at hos feet. The warden couldn't help but equate it with a scene of the urban warfare he'd been through in Iraq in the first yeas of the fighting. Or having just walked around a corner to see one of his mates wounded, but still moving, still functioning becuase he had too. And the way he'd watched the blood fall... Jason had told the guy to stay still, to wait for a medic, to let him stop the bleeding, but the younger man had insisted, had threatened him. But it was all for the good. If they had stopped there... That grenade might have killed them. And yet it that moment his fellow soldier had threatened him, Jason couldn't move. Couldn't dare understand what would make someone so...adamant.

And here was the same scene again. Only this crazy stranger was right to threaten him. They weren't friends, they didn't know each other, Jason was supposed to use force to make patient submit, supposed to manhandle them, supposed to pretend. Only in the end, Jason hated to pretend. He'd rather come out with the words of hate than try and live with someone he hated. Honesty, however brutal. "You're right, guys like me do pretend to be your friend. But I don't. I either am, or I'm not. Pretty simple. And right now, I'm not." It was a hard tone, one belaying the fact that he had his hands out in placation, that he was terrified of what could happen to him. Or the other guy. Or anyone else.

The sudden change of tone, the sudden move made him stumble back a half step, but he could still feel the press of something hard and metallic against his gut. His breathing grew tight, as if smaller inhalations would prevent the blade from piercing his flesh should its master want it to. "I'm not worth it, kid" he grunted. He smiled a little. He could pull the card, seeing as he was eight years older than this guy. True, twenty was hardly "kid" age, but Jason didn't care. If the guy stabbed him, though, that was a whole different story. Same with the mocking and stroking. He shivered at that last instance. Men touching him... He jerked away at his touch, the knife catching his uniform, tip biting his flesh, but the blade-wielding psycho had a moment of release himself, pulling away at the same time.

The warden grimaced, knowing it was his own stupidity that would gain his another scar. He eyed the twenty year old kid as he pulled back his shirt. The cut was small, but a little deeper than shallow. Idiot. He wiped the blood from his fingers on his pants, glancing back up to find the guy muttering to himself something about not having the knife and to leave him alone. Yeah, like he wanted to hang out with the halfwit who had tried to stab him. Somebody needed a straight jacket... But Jason could tell the guy was scarred, just as much, if not more than everyone else he'd met as far as patients.

He found it annoying that the guy thought to yell. Of course, someone people can't tell a deaf guy who doesn't make it obvious. Which was the preferred source of inaction, really. The less they knew, the better. The less they had to carry, the better. Keeping one hand on his lower abdomen, pressing his shirt into the wound to stem the blood, Jason watched the almost dumbly as the guy pushed past him, but he jerked himself out of the way before the guy could touch him a second time, waking up a bit and trying to stop his heart from beating out of his chest. "You're hardly alone even if I did leave." It was a sigh, a mutter, something Jason directed more at himself. And again, he shivered.

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Case: Sharpe, Jason
File #: 677
Date: 9/27/10
Cabinet: Gardens
Inquirer: Shepherd, Baylee
Status: Staff Only
Alarm: Content
Notes: Finally got to this one... lol

[baylee thomas shepherd]

BayleeThomasShepherd

[/size][/font]
[/center]

If you were the one
You wouldn't have hurt me so bad
You taught me how to
Break the Heart

-------------------------------------------

Baylee was still sitting on the bench. The blood carried on flowing down his arm. Well the warden wasn't doing anything so he didn't feel any threat from him. His heart was broken really badly it was doing his heading a lot now. He felt stupid and worthless that his boyfriend left him, alone, thrown away like a piece of trashed. He would never believe someone again. But the words which the warden have said, that made him see the light a little. Why am I being mean towards him for? He haven't done anything too me. I should at least allow him right? He battled with himself. Slowly got up trying his best too face his fear, the colour of his skin was getting pale, from the blood loss.

He got the knife and walked towards Jason. It wasn't being threaten of anyway. He handled the blade and then gave it too him. Yes he had another knife in his pocket. This was the only one left. So he gave it too him and a smiled. I am sorry for the way I acted earlier. It's not your fault that I was place in here. Not your fault that you are staff, we can be friends though right? I mean, be civil with each other. He asked him and he noticed he cut him a little and he backed away slowly. I didn't mean too hurt you sir, honestly I didn't. It was just too protect myself. Away from you. I was scared of you. Scared that you would he couldn't hurt someone on purpose.

His breathing was getting laboured as he was scared that he was going too hurt him by beaten him up, like the guards did too him before. Why haven't he called the doctors?

[/color] He didn't know but he was slowly getting the tust towards him. Sir can you help me please. I don't want too see the doctor as they would hurt me bad. I want the bleeding too stop, as I didn't mean to cut so deeply. I would be on the bench over there. If you can and will help me, come over. I wouldn't hurt you again I swear. You can put cuffs etc on my hands for your protection if you like, I wouldn't fight you. He started too walk off again, he then stopped again. Also your right I would never be alone. The reason is that I hear voices and see images which really there. They are the reason I hurt people sometimes, I can't help it though he smiled showing his friendliness side.

Slowly he walked back too the green bench and he took his black jacket off. The wound wasn't as large as he normally does it, but it was deep, really deep. Roughly seven stitches would be needed too stop the bleeding on the inside it was beginning too scare Baylee a lot now. He only wanted too get rid of the stress off his shoulder. As the blood kept on flowing out of his body, he waited and hope that Jason would come and help him. He wouldn't fight him, he was able too do anything too stop the bleeding, he meant EVERYTHING! So as he was running out of time, so his life was basically on Jason's hands now, as he settled down and slowly getting weak. His eyes were heavy and beginning too get harder and harder too keep open, knowing if he closed them he may never wake up again.[/font][/blockquote]

[jason laurence sharpe]

JUST WAIT ON THE STREET WITH YOUR ENDLESS WORDS
LOST FOREVER IN THE OCEAN OF FORGETFUL NOISE
SOMETIMES, EVERYONE CARES, BUT CAN'T HEAR

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He couldn't remember if he hated blood or not.

He wiped his hand on his pants, semi-disgusted with himself. Idiot, it rang again. Jason didn't understand the concept of senseless violence. That this guy had thought to stab him...and for what? Words? Some crazy lunatic had come this close to ripping his intestines out just because he directed attention to a sharp pointy object and said 'No?' The epitome of childish reactions. Grant Jaz had sorted of wanted the guy to try and poke a pretty hole in his, just for creative license to cause harm, but then, that's what the kid had wanted. And damn him if he wasn't one of those people who hated doing what others wanted them to do.

The warden was decidedly moody, and he knew it, but he preferred the caption. It was a grand way to proclaim 'leave me alone' without actually having to tell someone off. Of course, this kid with the sharp object fetish didn't seem to get the message. He went one about how he was sorry, how he hadn't meant to try and stab him, how he bloody well needed help for choosing to bloody cut himself. Idiot. But was that for him of the crazy patient?

This twenty year old child holding a pity party and bleeding out on the bench had to be kidding. If there was one thing that irked Jason the most about this job, it was the crazy people. Ironic, no? To have this guy all up in his face with a knife, then have him begging him for mercy was enough to make him gape in utter astonishment. Maybe, if the emotional disorders walking around had a routine, he might be able to live with this but, hell, when someone threatened you with a knife, you typically didn't give them a high score on the "first impressions" card.

Of course, he'd told himself he'd taken this job to help people in some way. And even if he did go over there and the kid did knife him in the stomach...well, at least he'd go to heaven, the schizo murderer would go to hell and Jason would never have to deal with him again. He sighed explosively, then walked over to bench, sizing up the blood puddle and the blood on his arm from the self-inflicted injury. Maybe a quart? Which was bad. Really, really bad.

He crouched beside the bench and reached for his panic button, the little alarm he was required to keep on him at all times, required to keep hidden. He was supposed to use in case of being attacked or otherwise injured by a patient, but he knew it was the fasted way to get medical attention on scene without having to take the time to run around looking for a doctor and screaming for help. Jason tugged off his uniform shirt, revealing a white tank top with a blood stain. He hoped this assholes didn't have some crazy disease that spread through blood contact... Just great...

Reluctantly using the blade the guy had threatened him with, Jason cut a strip from the bottom of the shirt, tacking his arm and trying it tight around his arm just below the elbow to staunch the flow of blood. Wrists, he knew, were tricky things. In his opinion, they bled too much for no reason. And while waiting on staff to arrive with medical equipment, he could only use the rest of his uniform shirt to apply pressure to the sliced flesh. "I hope you live, kid, because someone really needs to knock some sense into you..." the words were faint, a sigh, an honest truth that was said sincerely. Though he doubted the guy was still conscious. Jason shook his head. Idiot...

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Case: Sharpe, Jason
File #: 635
Date: 10/4/10
Cabinet: Gardens
Inquirer: Shepherd, Baylee
Status: Staff Only
Alarm: N/A
Notes: We'll see how this goes...